November 13, 2014

Letting Go, Looking Forward & Moving On...

Eight years ago I moved into my current address. A small, cozy two bedroom apartment where I found much peace and quiet. In fact, I sleep during the day because of my work schedule. I used to work late nights at bars/restaurants mostly, so it's a habit I've acquired over the last fifteen years. But, I also never liked mornings, lol... These days, I work steady afternoons. However, after midnight is when inspiration hits me! I've always been a nighthawk. The best thing about this place is the fact that my neighbourhood is quiet.

There's a park across the way where I like to watch the squirrels keeping busy in the grass and trees. They also scurry about on my balcony. It drives the cats crazy. Sometimes, I feel like I live in an attic hidden away from the rest of the world.

My door to the outside...
My landlord lives downstairs. He is an older gentleman who has been like an uncle to me. I've grown to care about him. But, as a tenant I am becoming frustrated with him forgetting to pay bills. And I have to ask five times to remind him to fix or do things. Lately, he's been neglecting to take care of the front property, too. The lady next door has complained to me about it, asking how I can stand to live here. I guess patience is a deep seeded virtue of mine. The first five years here were great! But then the landlord's wife got sick and passed away. Since she passed on, he has hoarded and accumulated more than the house can hold. It's busting at the seams. There's a distinct odour coming from his house and I realize that no matter how many times people (myself included) honestly advise him to change, he never will.

Last spring, I tried to help him clean up the backyard. In fact, I recruited my dad and a terrific girlfriend. We spent a whole afternoon sifting through the landfill back there. My dad trimmed up all the overgrown greenery and cleaned all the weeds from the garden bed. I was hoping to plant a garden this spring. But, for many reasons, particularly the fact that the backyard is run down and overfilled again, I have not planted a garden. I am using my spare room as a greenhouse instead.

An attempt to grow from seed...

Ultimately, I have lost the joy of living here. It's time to move on. And I'd rather not deal with a landlord anymore. I really don't want to have to move again after this (except to a bigger country home). After talking to my parents, siblings and friends, I've concluded what I want most in life at this time is my OWN place.

So... I've decided to buy a house! Just a small bungalow with lots of windows, storage and a generous backyard! I can start my homestead and really learn to take care of myself in a sustainable fashion. I will plant outdoor gardens for the mild months, and continue to grow a few edibles under my grow lights in a back room, or designated area during the winter months.

My Aloe Plant 7 or 8 years ago...

I'll need a protector for my new home. I'll still be limited to domestic animals, which means, no chickens or goats just yet (haha). I am super stoked to get a dog! And ready. I want a chocolate lab from a specific breeder. (Sidebar: I absolutely support adoption. However, after extensive research I've opted to purchase my first dog from a breeder. For a long healthy life. So I can know her background & pedigree. And, because I want a certain temperament to easily socialize with humans and other pets. In the long run, what I want most from a dog is a companion who will guide me through my physical stress, pain and fatigue. I believe a stellar labrador retriever is my best interest).

I will adopt dogs too one day. My future plans are to foster cats and dogs on behalf of the Humane Society. I want to help rehabilitate animals to prepare them for their furever homes. I've wanted a dog for years but didn't get one because I live in an apartment and I don't believe it's fair to keep a dog in an apartment. Dogs need to be outside as often as possible.

It feels like I'm taking a step in the right direction. My spirits have lifted. I'm a little nervous, but I know I will do great things with my own property. I have also gotten better with my spending habits and am learning to be frugal. I know how to keep it simple and reap the benefits of what nature has to offer. I am so excited to get to live the way I choose without needing approval from the landlord or waiting on a partner to make it happen... I've got people. Lots and lots of people who love and support me. I don't need to wait on anything or anyone. My future is now! Change is in the air. I am looking forward to what the future holds. Plenty.

~ Exhale ~